Sometimes I get nervous about things. I know…for those of you who know me this may come as a shock. Just kidding. Those of you how know me best know that I’m a bit of an anxious bird.
So, even though I’ve been in my new house and new town for more than a month, I’m still feeling a bit ill at ease. In Shreveport, I felt like I was finally understanding who I was supposed to be and the work that I was supposed to do. Then along comes change and shakes it all up.
Friends lived with us here for a while. Which gave me a decent excuse for not jumping in and establishing life here. I just figured I’d wait until things settled down a little more. And when the house was empty, I was anxious and at a loss about what I’m supposed to be doing with myself. I’m 25 and not getting any younger. Shouldn’t I have it all together by now?
In the face of all the uncertainty, I pulled a “classic Amy.”
I went home.
When everything is spinning out of control, it’s nice to put yourself back in a situation where everything makes sense. Where things smell familiar and the rhythm feels natural. When I go home {especially if I go home without Derek} I feel like I’m back in college…or high school. I drive the old Jeep that I drove when I was 17. I sleep in my bed. {Without a boy crowding me out.} And summer means time around the pool and a trip to the beach.
That’s how summer has always been. Even the photos don’t change that much. {The top photo is from last week…the photo below that is from 2007!} And as glorious as “new” and “adventurous” can be…there is something to be said about “familiar” and “known.” Just because you yearn for familiar sometimes, doesn’t mean you can’t be bold and daring. Trust me.
Now that I’m back home to Minot…I cannot say things have magically fallen into place. But I do feel back on track. Refreshed and ready to move forward.
Thank you Elkhart and everyone at home. For simply being home. For simply being my safe, sound, ultimate happy place…without even trying. I cannot wait to be back.
Amy
PS…Where is your regrouping place? How do you find focus again when things start to get intimidating?
