Welcome back to the Intentional Living Series. Today I’m sharing powerful but practical ways to create an intentional home. In case you missed a post, you can find them here:
In the previous installments of this series, I’ve shared a bit about my walk through anxiety, depression and mental health crisis. Intentionality in all aspects of my life was key for healing. It’s been key to my continued state of complete mental health.
Take Control of Your Home
We lock our doors. Security systems alert us to anything fishy happening on our property. Doorbell cams allow us to see who is at our door, right on our phones–no matter where we are.
We are intentional about keeping intruders out of our home. But often, the most dangerous voices in our home sneak in, in the form of books, movies, TV and media. These intruders come in because we underestimate their harm.
It’s time to get intentional and take control of what is speaking into your mind (and the minds of your family) within your own walls. Doing so will help you take your thoughts captive, and rid your mind of unwanted thoughts. It will relieve anxiety and allow you to live in a space of Truth.
Let’s get started.
What Does Intentionality At Home Look Like?
An intentional home is purposefully curated to create an atmosphere of positivity and truth.
An intentional home is orderly and consistently directs thoughts to places of positivity and Truth. An intentional home is not chaotic. Decisions are made with confidence, boundaries are clear, individuals are free to explore their God-given gifts and have clarity of mind.
An intentional home is purposefully curated to create an atmosphere of positivity and truth.
How To Create an Intentional Home
Intentionality at home begins with the action steps we talked about in Part II.Apply these same principles to what you bring into your house. To create an intentional home we’ll look at two key steps.
Auditing what you already have in your home.
Pausing before you bring anything into your home.
I’m not covering intentionality in relationships or parenting. Instead, we’ll focus on media (TV, movies, books, audiobooks, magazines, social media–and any other media you can think of) and decor/tangible items.
Audit What’s Already in Your Home
Think strategically and purposefully about what you are allowing into your home.
Auditing simply means giving close examination to something. I’m not implying you need to completely purge all your media and home decor. Only that you need to give close examination to what you’ve currently got.
When I first began living intentionally, I learned that I needed to create a filter for what I was consuming. Your list may be different than mine, that’s okay.
At the core, I want the things that I’m watching, listening to, looking at, setting before my family to “set my mind on things above, not on earthly things.” (Colossians 3:2) The idea of a filter is to think strategically and purposefully about what you are allowing into your home.
Here are places to audit. (This isn’t an exhaustive list.)
TV shows you watch and stream
Movies you own, stream, and watch
Books you own, borrow from the library, discuss in clubs
Audio books you own, borrow and discuss
Magazines you own and subscribe to
Computer use
Gaming
Music you own and stream
Podcasts you listen to
Social media influencers you follow, groups you participate in, platforms you participate in
Decor with words, images or other messages
Here are examples of questions that will help you intentionally filter what you already have in your home/life:
Does this build positivity in my mind/environment?
Is this helpful to consume?
Does this glorify God? Or does this go against His Word?
Will this distract me from God’s Truth or God’s best for me/my family?
What is my heart motivation for watching/reading/keeping this?
Will consuming/keeping this in my home life exemplify Christ to nonbelievers?
Will this in any way harm my marriage?
Does this reinforce God’s Truth/the truth of His character or detract from it?
Does this feed a stronghold in my life?
Pause Before You Allow Anything Into Your Home
As you bring things or media into your home, remember to be purposeful and strategic. You are curating a space an an atmosphere.
When my mental state was very vulnerable, I knew I needed to quiet lots of voices around me. There were too many things speaking into my life. I was rarely alone in the quiet, able to hear God, discern His voice or decipher Truth from lie.
I didn’t have the mental capacity to audit. So I turned everything off. A complete fast from social media, TV, movies, audiobooks, radio, podcasts, magazines, books…
At first I only read the Bible.
Then I allowed Christian radio in the car.
Then Bible study videos when I just wanted to “watch TV” at the end of the day.
The progression stalled there for quite some time. As healing happened, I knew it was unrealistic to keep myself completely turned off from all media and the outside world. My audit had been hasty, but adding things back in was very intentional. I paused and considered before allowing anything back in.
Shows that I once loved were cut out (many without closure.) The same went for all other media–including social. At first it was hard, but the process was worth it. My mind was clear and I had a new sense of ownership and pride over my home. I had taken charge of what was coming in, how it was consumed.
Home became a sanctuary, where I knew what was coming into my mind was safe and true.
As you bring things or media into your home, remember to be purposeful and strategic. You are curating a space an an atmosphere. Pause and consider each decision carefully.
How to Pause
Hold the things you allow into your home to a high standard, you’re worth it.
To create an intentional home, you’ll need to pause too. Be strategic and purposeful when you bring anything into your home. Use the list from your audit as you put things back in place. Hold the things you allow into your home to a high standard, you’re worth it.
Explain this process to your family, especially your children. This will teach them to be intentional about what they consume from a young age. And as stated in Part II: living intentionally always has a why.
If you decide to add something to your home, watch something, play something, listen to something, etc…you should be able to give a quick “why.” A reason to defend its place in your home. A reason to defend its presence as a voice speaking into your mind.
It’s weird at first, but you can do it. With practice it will become second nature. Your mind, heart, and family will thank you.
Items in Your Home
The last thing I’ll touch on are items in your home. What kind of imagery is surrounding you, your marriage and your children? What words are displayed on your wall? When you unlock your phone, what’s in the background? What words are inscribed on your favorite mug?
Audit these things too.
As you seek to create an intentional home, don’t underestimate the power held in objects you see every day. These can speak positivity into your heart. They can set your mind on things above. Or they can pull your heart toward strongholds, lies, brash jokes (unbecoming of a child of God.) These things can help redirect your thoughts (see part III) or push your thoughts toward things of the world, doubts, lust, and lies.
Bring in objects that constantly push your thoughts heavenward. Fill your home with imagery that lifts your heart and aligns it with God.
Create an Intentional Home and an Intentional Life
I know you can do this. Start small and be consistent. Intentionality will become routine, second nature. For more inspiration for intentional living join me on Instagram and Facebook. I share tips, anecdotes and everyday devotionals that teach you to see God’s goodness in the everyday, study Scripture effectively, know God deeply and overcome anxiety and depression. Hope to see you there.
Happy Minot Monday! Today I’m talking about our visit to the Dakota Territory Air Museum. Minot Monday is made possible through a partnership with BeLOCAL Minot. Their mission is to help you find local favorites and live like a local quickly. Check them out for ideas of other places to go and local tips.
Last week I knocked another item off of my Fall Bucket List–visiting the Dakota Territory Air Museum. Since they close for the winter (in October) I wanted to be sure to squeeze in a visit. I’d never been before and Gideon and I had a great time exploring together. Here’s what you need to know before you go:
Adjust Your Expectations
It’s not the Smithsonian. The Dakota Territory Air Museum is a small museum in North Dakota. Don’t go in expecting elaborate displays or fancy interactive activities. This is very much a self-led museum that will require you to do your own learning and make your own fun. (In my opinion, there are lots of good things about doing it that way too!)
If you go in with an open mind, ready to learn a few things and see some really cool airplanes, I think you’ll have a good time.
What is the Dakota Territory Air Museum? What Was Our Visit Like?
[The Dakota Territory Air Museum is] a significant historical depository honoring the men, women and machines that have impacted the rich history of aviation.
Inside there is a “show room” of sorts with lots of aircraft models, uniforms and memorabilia. After this first room guests can explore three hangers full of aircrafts that range in age, size and mission. (Seeing the planes up close was our favorite part.) There are also static displays outside that you can get up close to.
Within each hanger there was at least one plane you could climb inside and explore. This hands-on experience was the highlight of our visit. Gideon loved being able to pretend to fly the plane (“just like daddy”) and push all the buttons and knobs.
Through play, we acted out parts of flight that Gideon knows through books and seeing daddy do it in small aircrafts: talking to control tower, taxiing, taking off and landing. He’s only 2.5, so exploring these basics was more important than reading the signs and trying to teach him aviation history.
My favorite parts of the museum were the “loft” in the second hanger–which had a lovely library and sitting area, next to huge windows that overlook the airport runways–and the WWII hanger. Who doesn’t love to see War Birds up close?
We spent just over an hour exploring the hangers. For us this was a perfect amount of time.
Who Should Go?
I thought about this a lot during our visit, knowing I’d be writing to you about it. I think our visit proves that anyone can go and enjoy it. However, there are groups that would probably appreciate it more.
I deem this a great place to take parents who come to visit you in Minot. This is right up my dad’s alley–and several of the other visitors while we were there were middle aged and older men, who really seemed to be enjoying it.
Groups. The museum offers educational tours for schools and groups year-round. I think a group tour would help the information and history come alive a bit more.
Young children. This is a great outing for littles who will be intrigued by seeing the planes up close, and learning a bit about them. However, if your child has a hard time staying ” in the lines”, this will be a stressful outing for you. Most planes are roped off, but littles can easily sneak underneath.
Unless going with a group, I envision this to be a hard place to take a middle-schooler or teen (unless they have an affinity for aviation.) Since it’s not very hands on or interactive, this age group may have trouble focusing or being content to look at the aircrafts. (But take my word with a grain of salt. I didn’t go with a teen. I just know it would have been a place I would have struggled with when I was that age.)
Final Thoughts
We have no regrets about going to the Dakota Territory Air Museum. The admission is low, especially for military families (only $5 for visitors over 5). For us, it was money well spent for a fun afternoon.
Let me know if you go and what you think!
For more on living in Minot, things to do, daily inspiration for intentional living and choosing to see the positive be sure to follow me on Instagram and Facebook. Or explore all my Minot Monday posts here. You can also sign up for emails, and get every post straight to your inbox.
For more ideas on fun things to do, remember to check out BeLOCAL. And check in with my Instagram (and Facebook) stories every Monday night for a round up of events going on in town each week.
I’ve spent lots and lots of nights laying awake, battling unwanted thoughts. I’ve spent days frozen in fear brought on by ideas dancing through my head. Panic attacks, racing heart, sweaty hands, the feeling of being utterly, hopelessly stuck. If any of that sounds familiar to you, I’m glad you’re here. This is for you. It’s time to take your thoughts captive. Let me tell you what has worked for me.
Not all that long ago the thought of sitting in a nursery with a little on the way made my blood run cold.
I remember sitting in a tiny Mexican restaurant several years ago–nearly in tears as I told Derek I thought it was time to start a family. These were not happy tears or tears of expectation. They were tears of fear. But alas, we were getting older and had been married nearly 10 years. This is what came next. Like it or not.
I’d been laying awake at night, distracted during the day. Being a mom terrified me. My mind had accepted lies (some created by me, others fed to me over many years) about motherhood. These lies told me that being a mom meant life was over. If I hadn’t achieved “success” by the time I got pregnant I never would. Being a mom meant I’d amount to nothing and all the good things God had handed me would be wasted. It meant I would be a failure–to myself, God and my spouse. (More on lies here.)
Lies or no lies, we were getting older. This is what needed to be done. By stating I thought we should start a family, I was giving up on a lot of things.
Intentionality in Thought is to Take Your Thoughts Captive
I will spare you many more details. The story ends like this: We didn’t have kids at that time. My mind went from this state of anxiety and unwanted thoughts to a full break (more here). Eventually I found healing. During that process I started to notice lots of unwanted thoughts floating around my mind. About motherhood, and lots of other things. And I decided not to let them run my life any more.
God had given me the word intentionality (read about that here) and I began applying it to my thoughts. I stopped being prey for lies and scary thoughts and started being their predator. I began to take those thoughts captive.
And today, I’m going to share how you can take your thoughts captive too.
Identify Strongholds
Before you being to take your thoughts captive, you must identify strongholds.
What IS a stronghold?
Until I was coming out of a mental health crisis I had never heard the term “stronghold” used as Christian jargon. A friend gave me this book–and it had a huge impact on my healing. I understood what a stronghold was and knew that was exactly what I’d been fighting for the last few months.
Max Lucado has a great post on strongholds here. This is a quote that sums it up:
What is that one weakness, bad habit, rotten attitude? Where does the devil have a stronghold on you? Ahh, there is the word that fits–stronghold–fortress, citadel, thick walls, tall gates. It’s as if the devil has fenced in one negative attribute, one bad habit, one weakness and constructed a rampart around it. “You ain’t touching this flaw,” he defies to heaven and he places himself squarely between God’s help and your: __[insert stronghold here]_______.
Literally, where does Satan have a strong hold on you? For me…it was lots of places.
This is uncomfortable to think about. It requires vulnerability, an admission that you are flawed and have been deceived.
Welcome to the club. Let me, and the whole of Scripture assure you, you are not alone.
Remain Teachable
The sermon at church on Sunday centered on renewing the mind. It so closely mirrored my outline for this post it was eerie. Anyway, our pastor had a great quote that I’ll share here about strongholds:
[Strongholds] keep us from being who God wants us to be and receiving what God wants to give us.
Strongholds are the key to thinking intentionally and taking your thoughts captive. Identify where Satan has a hold on your thoughts–where are they running amok? Then remain teachable to correct those thoughts and overcome.
Fear is a red flag that I am withholding something from God.
Fear is a red flag that I/you/we are withholding something from God. For me, the gripping fear of being a mom meant I was withholding my career, ideal of success, trust in His provision, trust in His ability to use my gifts from God.
If you cannot humble yourself to learn, incorrect, destructive thoughts will continue to control your mind processes. This in turn, will leave you enslaved to your fears and unruly ideas.
Accept That Not All Thoughts Are Wanted or Needed
It’s a myth that we cannot control our thoughts, that everything in our minds is put there by God.
Thoughts are influenced and implanted in our minds from many sources. Key being: worldly influence and lies/fear surrounding our strongholds. (This is why the Audit in Part II is so important to daily, intentional living.)
Once you accept that not all thoughts are needed, you are free to ruthlessly take your thoughts captive and throw the unwanted to the dumpster. Chase them down and eliminate them. You can restrain your thoughts. Your mind can renewed. (Romans 12:2)
Redirect
Okay, you identified where you are vulnerable (strongholds) and accepted that not all thoughts need to take up your valuable headspace. You’ve taken your thoughts captive and know you want to be rid of them.
Now what?
Now is the time for redirection. If the space that those thoughts occupied remains empty, it’s an invitation for them to reenter. (See Col 3:1-5)
Redirection is easier to say than do. Just think of something else. *insert eye roll here** I know firsthand that it’s not as simple as just wishing you could think of something else. I’ve been there.
Those unwanted thoughts that you just can’t shake are fruit from the tree of fear and anxiety. They’re a sign that a lie has taken root in your heart and mind. Identify the root of the lie, yank it out, and replace it with Truth.
This takes work. Auditing (see part II) and eliminating things you have come to like. But the freedom it brings is worth all the eliminating and auditing in the world.
How to Redirect Your Thoughts
When I was most in need of intentionality in my thinking I put a huge limit on what was speaking into my life. I shut down all the voices, except a very few that I knew were speaking truth. Here are helpful techniques to redirect/correct lots of very tricky, unwanted thoughts:
Commitment to be in the Word daily.
Praying daily for the Holy Spirit to open my eyes to strongholds and teach me to overcome them.
Praying daily that my eyes would be open to the lies I’d been deceived by and the Truth God wanted me to understand.
When I didn’t know how to pray, I turned back to this book.
Researching one topic at a time, journaling/listing everything God said about that topic. (For me I looked into every reference to God as a father, parents, parenting, and mothers.)
Pressing pause on all unscriptural voices speaking into me (social media, TV, movies, books, audiobooks, etc.)
Follow Jesus’ example. When He was tempted by lies and unwanted thoughts He turned to God’s Word to shut them down. (Matt 4:1-11). Humbly accept that what you may think is true may be flawed. Be in the Word, redirect your mind to Truth.
Ruthlessly remove anything that negatively affects your mind and ability to absorb God’s Word.
This last point is key. There is no quick fix for taking your thoughts captive, eliminating unwanted thinking and being totally intentional in your mind. It’s going to take time and practice (see Part II).
But you can do it. Really, you can.
Your thoughts should not be master over you. You can one Master and His yoke is kind. His will is not to keep you pinned under the weight of fear inflicted by thoughts He never intended to fill your mind.
Begin to weed out the lies and what you are withholding from God–these are at the root of unwanted thoughts. Address them one at a time. Then, when things have cleared up, continue the practice. You must be diligent not to let them reenter. New strongholds may arise, but you will be equipped with intentionality, to master what is in your mind and redirect it with Truth.
Join me on Instagram and Facebook for more on intentionally living for Christ, knowing His Word and seeing His hand in daily living. If you are liking this series, share it and let me know! I’d love to hear from you.
Happy Minot Monday! I’m so excited to tell you all about Berry Acres Pumpkin Patch today. This is truly a highlight of our fall here. I’m partnering with BeLOCALMinotto bring you useful, authentic insight to life in Minot. BeLOCAL is a publication dedicated to helping you live like a local and find the best of what Minot has to offer.
One staple of a Minot autumn is Berry Acres Pumpkin Patch. We’ve lived in a lot of places, and friends–this is my favorite fall attraction of all those places. There’s so much to do and see, not to mention the atmosphere is pure autumn bliss. If you haven’t gone, if you aren’t familiar–let me enlighten you. This is a good one.
What is Berry Acres Pumpkin Patch?
Ummmm…To explain it simply, Berry Acres Pumpkin Patchis fall in Minot. There are pumpkins (obviously) but there is much more. Berry Acres offers pumpkins and gourds of all kinds. From the traditional jack-o-lantern variety to heirlooms and giants that will make your front stoop the talk of the block.
Besides pumpkins (and other fresh farmers’ market goodies like jellies) the property is jam packed with activities. And every year it seems to grow with great ideas and additions. With admission you can enjoy a
corn maze
pedal carts
zip line tracks
hay bales for climbing with slides
tire mountain (and more slides)
the corn box (like a sand box, but filled with dried corn)
giant chess and checkers
swings
For a small extra fee you can:
play mini golf
ride the kiddy train
take a hay ride
go on a paint ball wagon ride
shoot the pumpkin cannon
play laser tag
see animals at the petting zoo
chip golf balls toward Birdie Island
When I say small fee–I do mean small. The prices are so reasonable. **Take note, additional activities may only be available on certain dates. Check their Facebook page for full details.**
Our Day At Berry Acres
Every year we live in Minot, an autumn trip to Berry Acres is a tradition. Each year brings a new theme (this year is Toy Story) and new activities. When we had no kids this was a really fun day to spend picking pumpkins, wandering the corn maze and taking in all the fun. Now that we’re parents, it’s even more fun because we can share it with our little.
We headed over after church and a quick lunch. Before nap, we climbed hay bales, explored slides, felt all the unique pumpkins, rode on swings and pet the baby animals in the petting zoo.
It was so much fun (and Sunday is our rest day), we decided to come back after nap time was over. During our second trip out we revisited Gideon’s favorites: the tire mountain, hay bales and slides. Then we did zip tracks, the corn maze and picked three perfect pumpkins to take home.
This was an idyllic autumn day. This is wonderful tradition to start with your family.
Where is Berry Acres Pumpkin Patch?
Berry Acres Pumpkin Patch is easy to find. It’s off of County Road 15 W. Just west of town. You can access it from the 83 Bypass, or follow 4th Ave NW out of town (4th turns into CR 15 W). Here’s the map.
Country Road 15 W is a beautiful road full of fall color at this time of year. Berry Acres is easy to spot, but you need to look for a sign you might not expect. The roadside sign does not say “Berry Acres Pumpkin Patch.” It says “Green Thumb Greenhouse.” When you see the sign, you’re at the right place.
More Minot Fun
For more Minot fun be sure to follow along on Facebook and Instagram where I share inspiration for intentional living and positivity about Minot everyday. In my stories I share a weekly roundup of fun things happening in town each every Monday and a look at life in Minot everyday. And remember to check out BeLOCAL to find even more local favorites and seasonal events.
It’s been a year since we closed on Acorn House and started on a crazy adventure. There’s still a long way to go, but things have definitely improved.
As always, these photos are basically unstaged. This is house my house looked when the photos were taken (including the afters.) As time goes on, I’ll share a full “after” of each completed room. But there are very few of those right now. Thanks for coming along on the trip. Be sure to follow along on Instagram (I’ll be sharing lots of Acorn House, the early days video content this weekend.)
For now, I’ll let the photos speak for themselves.
Okay. So I forgot to get a photo of the hall now. This is pretty close to finished. But it’s fully painted and there are no ladders up there now.
Second Floor Bathroom: Before
Second Floor Bathroom: After
Master Powder Room: Before
Okay. So this was the actual second floor bathroom. And it didn’t connect to the master bedroom. But–it did have an ash tray reachable from the toilet and a toilet paper dispenser that had a built in radio.
Now this space houses our shoes, a clothing rack, sink and medicine cabinet. It offers a walk through to the full bathroom without needing to go into the hall. We have been pleasantly surprised by how much use we are getting out of this space.
Second Floor Bedroom: Before
Second Floor Bedroom: After
Nearly done, just waiting on the drawers to get finished up!
Master Bedroom: Before
Master Bedroom: After(ish)
Yes, there is laundry strewn about. But this is my real life. I snapped this photo a couple days after we finally moved into the master bedroom. Usually the laundry isn’t running amok. I’m almost ready to do a full post on this one.
Rooftop Patio: Before
This is a screenshot from an Instagram Story when we first moved in. Trash and saplings were everywhere. The roof was literally caving in over the garage.
Unstaged, but still very pleasant. This is one of our favorite places. We eat loads of meals out here and we love to sit and read books on the couch. Like I said, there’s still a long way to go, but we’ve also come a long way too.
More Projects and Life at Acorn House
Want more projects and to see behind the scenes progress? Follow along on Instagram and Facebook. There you’ll join a community of people striving to live intentionally and see life through a Christ-centered lens. I share tips and inspiration for living daily for God, intentionally seeing the positive, and fully understanding Scripture.
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I’ve seen it work in my own life, in my own walk with anxiety and depression. Today, I’m sharing action steps to start living intentionally everyday.
Between 2014 and 2016 something happened to my brain. The term “break down” has a bad connotation. But things started to fall apart in my brain during the summer of 2014. I continued down a slippery slope until things really came to a head in the winter of 2015. By then, things had really eroded. I refused to accept that the mental state (anguish) I was experiencing was my “new normal.”
In the early months of 2016 I found a counselor who told me it didn’t need to be this way. After spending nearly two years in mental agony and seeking help for about 18 months, he was the first professional who told me healing was possible. He was the first person who believed I could overcome and fully heal.
He was right.
When I Started to Living Intentionally Everyday
When I entered counseling, I was learning many things and trying to put them into practice. In essence, to create “new, normal” thinking patterns–after many years of patterns that had culminated in cyclical anxiety and depression. I won’t go into all the details, but I will tell you that I asked God to give me a word that I could use as a mantra. Something that summed up many of the things I was learning. The word He laid on my heart?
Intentionality.
Intentionality in who I listened to, what I accepted as truth, to root out lies, about how I spent my time and what I said yes to. I needed to cultivate intentionality in the words that I spoke (especially to myself), boundaries I established and what came into my home (and mind.)
Intentionality is a force that started small, and truly transformed the way I thought and the overwhelm in my mind.
Intentionality is a mind game. And it’s a game you can win. It starts by putting purpose and thought into your everyday decisions. That grows into confidence and a routine that will flow out into the rest of your life. Leaving you calmer, knowing that your commitments aren’t controlling you, and with headspace (and time) to take on tasks God designed you for.
Today I’m sharing a few action steps you can take toward living intentionally everyday.
Decide
When I talk to friends about intentionality and anxiety something that comes up over and over is decision making. The thought of making a decision–or a wrong decision–causes sweaty palms and a medusa-like freeze up.
Intentionality is a mind game.At first it feels awkward, because it’s a new way of thinking. You’ve spent years training your mind to freeze up at the thought of making a choice. Living intentionally everyday, starts and ends with making intentional decisions. Start building your confidence today by purposefully making small choices each day.
Rehearse Out Loud
Set yourself up to make some easy decisions. Then practice saying it out loud. Truth is, you make choices all day, everyday. Practicing out loud (in front of your child, spouse, or home alone) will help you see that you aren’t as terrible at making choices as you may think.
When you decide what to do next, what to eat, etc say it. State the decision and a why. The why is important–this is the intentional part. “I’m going to fold laundry now because it’s an activity the kids can help with. I’ll deep clean the bathroom later, while they are napping.”
You might feel silly, but you’ve got to start somewhere.
As you make these small decisions, stick to them. A great place to practice is with a child. State your decision, then follow through. “Two more times down the slide, then we need to go home for dinner.” Say it. Do it.
Audit
Living intentionally everyday means you need to examine what is currently in your life, and make cuts as needed. Here are ways to get started.
Audit Your Daily To-Do List
Lots of my anxiety (even panic) was induced from a task list that was too long and too powerful. If I didn’t get it done, I felt guilty, thought I couldn’t do anything right, and fed myself lies of low self-worth.
Here are action steps to audit your to-do list.
Make a conscious decision to say “no” to a task. Mark it off as you prioritize other tasks. I found saying it aloud or in my head–the choice and the “why”–to be helpful. “I’m not going to get the floor mopped today. It’s more important to take advantage of the nice weather and go to the zoo before it closes for winter.”
Accept that you can’t do it all. Refrain from guilt. “I need to finish painting the nursery. That means tidying up the living room will need to wait.”
Audit Your Intake
What are you taking in? Mentally? Emotionally? Educationally? What are you absorbing through social media, TV, music? What voices speak into your mind, heart and family?
At the height of my mental health crisis I turned everything off. For a season I left social media, TV, audiobooks, books and movies. I read and listened only to the Bible or Bible study videos. I limited who I spoke to and shared my struggles with. Eventually I turned things back on. But bad habits had been broken and I was able to make healthier, more intentional choices.
Audit Your Home
Similar to auditing your intake, you can take steps toward intentionality by examining what is currently in your home and what you bring in. Are you surrounded with positive messages? Or oppressive clutter? Are you bringing in items haphazardly because you don’t want to see them thrown away? Or thoughtfully choosing what crosses your threshold?
Audit Your Commitments
Purposefully look at the commitments filling your calendar. Are you overwhelmed? Challenge: cut out one commitment. Use polite, but firm language. I assure you, nearly everyone is more understanding about your need to step away than you are.
**I don’t encourage you to leave a team in the lurch. Wrap up your duties and step down. Or speak to the person in charge to make a plan to transition out.
Pause
Pausing is critical to living intentionally everyday. It’s a technique that you’ll benefit from the rest of your life. It goes like this: just pause.
After you’ve audited, start pausing before you add anything back in.
When asked to do something, pause. If you are spending money–first pause. Responding to a fussy toddler or sassy teen? Pause. Adding something to your to-do list? Pause. Turning on the TV, renting a movie, downloading a new audio book? Pause.
Intentionality is purposeful, not a knee-jerk reaction. Practice pausing and taking a moment, or days to come up with an intentional, well-thought response. This will open space in your schedule, home, and mind for things that matter, things that excite your heart and use your God-given gifts.
Own It
Own the decisions you make. The opposite of intentional living is random living. This is not the design God had in mind for us.
We were designed with purpose, structure, order. It’s no wonder that our minds and hearts are more at ease when these principles are in play within our everyday existence.
Random living puts power in forces that are not meant to have dominion over you. Intentional living gives that power back. Own each decision you make. Manifest the truth that you are in control.
If you intentionally decide something and it goes totally amiss–just make another decision. You had reason for choosing what you did. Sometimes things just go wrong. Make a different choice next time…or make a choice right now to get things back on track.
Practice
Like most things worth pursuing, intentionality will take practice and self discipline. However, it will get easier. Commit to practicing a more intentional lifestyle. Choose one of the action steps above to start with. Then add another as you become practiced at the first.
Set a small goal, then take intentional steps toward accomplishing it. Think very small and very specific. Examples: Memorizing one Bible verse each week for a month. Going for a walk everyday for a week. Getting to bed 30 minutes earlier for a week. Etc.
More On Living Intentionally Everyday
Next week’s Intentional Living post will cover taking our thoughts captive and practicing intentionality in our thinking.
In the meantime, I’d love it if you joined me on Facebook and Instagram where I share about cultivating intentionality and a Christ-centered perspective daily. And remember to share this if it’s helped you or touched your heart!
I’m launching a new short series all about Intentionality. Today I’m sharing how intentionality relieves anxiety. Other posts in the series will cover: Action Steps to Intentionality, Intentionality in your mind (taking your thoughts captive), and Cultivating an Atmosphere of Intentionality at Home.
I’ve talked before about my struggles with mental health. I feel God pulling on my heart to share more. Battling anxiety and depression is exhausting and oh-so-hard. But I’ve found complete healing and I think others can too. So I’m planning content that will share more of that journey with you. Starting with this series. *At the end of this post is a simple prayer for the anxious heart!*
When God Whispered Intentionality
Several years ago while in the midst of a mental health crisis and counseling I cried out to God. I asked Him to pass me a word that would sum up lots of what I’d been learning the new thought patterns I was trying to make “normal.” A word that would help me move forward.
Intentionality.
I heard it whispered into my heart. Plucked from all the words in my vocabulary. As always, God knows the heart and He gave me a good gift. It’s exactly what I needed to hear.
Focusing on cultivating intentionality, being intentional in my actions, thoughts and decisions was key for me in finding complete healing from depression and anxiety. I really do believe complete healing is possible. For you. For your loved ones.
Whether you are having a mental crisis, like I was–or just want to tame stress and indecision, I’m here for you. Over the next few weeks I’m going to share how I implemented intentionality in my life and how it gave my mind freedom to heal. How it continues to give me confidence to move forward, without wallowing in guilt over what I “could have” “should have” or “might have” done.
Case Study: Living in a Renovation
As we wrap up the remodel of our second floor, (in case you don’t know, when I’m not writing, creating or teaching, I work to oversee renovations on our 1927 fixer upper. See a before tour here. Follow on Instagram for all the behind the scenes fun in my stories) I realized this is the perfect time to talk about intentionality.
When a big project is happening, I get overwhelmed. In the past, taking on many things at once triggered anxiety and panic. In turn, this brought on a depression.
This is the thought waterfall that would progress.
I couldn’t get it all done at once. Panic. Feelings of anxiety, guilt and sadness set in based on my lack of performance. Thoughts of low self worth followed. Those thoughts manifested into belief, which manifested into depression.
It took time to identify and break those deeply rooted thought patters–and lots of work to create a new, “normal” way of thinking and processing. Cultivating intentionality helps me avoid falling into that trap and maintain my calm and confidence.
Over the last month I’ve needed to scrape mountains of peeling paint, repair plaster, paint, refinish floors, cut and install trim, clean up debris…etc. This was all happening while I stay-at-home-mommed full time, wrote studies and resources here on the blog, hosted friend gatherings at our home, carried out the other day-to-day tasks of being an “at home” parent, and said “yes” to ministry opportunities God laid in front of me.
My plate has been full. I bet yours has been too. In no way am I trying to be the Little Red Hen about this. I have help. I have an amazing husband. It’s just an illustration that things have been overwhelming and this could have easily taken on a panicky aspect.
How Cultivating Intentionality Relieves Anxiety and Offers Freedom and Confidence.
I can’t cover all the ways intentionality relieves anxiety in one post. That’s where the series comes in. Today I’m sharing how being intentional has relieved my anxiety and brought freedom into my busy, overworked mind. It can work for you too.
In the following weeks I’ll cover:
Action steps to intentionality
Intentionality in your mind (taking your thoughts captive)
Cultivating an atmosphere of intentionality at home
1. Confidence in Decision Making
Are you frazzled by decision-making? Do you have regrets or beat yourself up for making a “wrong” decision? Does anxiety over possibly making a wrong decision plague you? If so, let me introduce you to intentionality.
As I work on the house, many decisions need to be made. Often with a toddler crawling on me, or in spare minutes between renovations, meals and nap time. Not every choice I’ve made has been perfect. But they’ve all been intentional. I haven’t been anxious or sleepless. By practicing intentionality in my decisions I have gained confidence. Now, decisions (even tricky ones) are made more quickly, effectively and without regret.
2. Intentionality Puts You in Control
Ever feel like things are spinning out of control? Things are being thrown on your plate without consent? You are running as fast as you can but you can’t catch up. Have you felt helpless? If this is you, let me teach you about intentionality.
In the midst of a huge renovation things can easily seem to get out of control. The to-do list is long. Daily responsibilities don’t go away. And it always seems like new opportunities to serve are cropping up–adding more weight to an already heavy plate.
Purposefully bing intentional puts you in control. Not your to-do list. Not the needs of others. You’ll be in awe of what you can accomplish once this power struggle is gone.
3. Relief From Inadequacy
Thoughts of inadequacy used to plague me. Do they haunt you sometimes too? Let’s get intentional.
It’s easy to slide into the belief that you are inadequate when you’re under a mountain of stress (or a giant mess left over from a remodel). I get it. There is always more to be done. A mind practiced in intentionality will take ownership of how time and skill are stewarded. This mind grips God’s truth. You are not made adequate by your works, but by His completed work.
Cultivating intentionality shines truth on the lie of inadequacy. You are in control of the time and skill God has given you. With God’s help, you can take your thoughts (and to-do list) captive and live in freedom.
4. Being Comfortable With Limitations
Are you cool and collected toward the reality that you have limitations? I’m speaking from experience. Trying to do it all, all the time is a fool’s errand. Eventually, it’ll leave you frozen, making spastic progress–neither an ideal outcome.
As with any project, things look worse before they look better. There comes a boiling point where I need to recognize my limitations. and make intentional decisions. Will I cook dinner, or finish plastering a wall? Can I live with the mess in the living room and power through a second coat of floor finish? Will I finish painting trim after bedtime, or just take a shower and go to sleep?
To complete house projects, things in other areas need to slide a little. The photo above shows how my house really looked as I neared the end of the messy work upstairs. Toys strewn about. Chairs stacked up (in hopes that mopping would happen soon.) General disarray.
I needed to chose how to spend my time and own that decision with confidence. Sometimes I chose to plough through tasks upstairs. Sometimes I took a day off and tamed and tended the first floor. No regrets, only a heart of gratitude for the time God hands me and the rest He gifts us.
5. Replace Anxiety With Confidence
To sum it up, chunks of my anxiety have been replaced with confidence, simply by cultivating intentionality. Where nervousness used to reign, calm confidence now lives. Intentionality relieves anxiety. Very purposeful thinking has swept away things past anxiety and panic triggers.
Intentionality Relieves Anxiety
Maybe it’s silly. Or oversimplified. But it worked for me. And I believe it can help you too. Next week I’ll share specific action steps that helped me move toward intentional thought patterns that have become my new normal.
In the meantime, I’d love to have you join me on Facebook an Instagram. There you’ll join a community striving to live intentionally and see the world through a Christ-centered lens. I share daily encouragement and anecdotes of how I see God’s hand in everyday life. You can also sign up for emails below. That way you’ll never miss a post–and you’ll be sure to catch the entire Intentionality series.
A Simple Prayer For an Anxious Heart
Jesus, I know you don’t call me to live in fear, overwhelm or nervousness. But that’s easier said than done. Teach me to be intentional with my time, skills and decisions. To follow in your example of intentionality as you taught, healed and ministered during your earthly ministry. Open my mind to understand the Truth of Your freedom, and to dispel the lies of inadequacy, guilt and low self worth that stem from an anxious heart. Give me a teachable spirit to learn a new way of thinking that better aligns with your best for me. Amen.
Happy Minot Monday! Today’s post is a follow up to last week’s on Things to do in Minot in the Fall. I’m sharing the things I personally plan to try this fall right here in town. It’s my Minot Fall Bucket List. Minot Monday is made possible through a partnership with BeLOCAL Minot. Read their publication for lots more ideas on local things to do!
Minot in the fall in a wonderful thing. Last week I shared 10 ideas of things to do in Minot this fall. Today’s post is a follow up to that. I’ve gotten some questions recently about the things I actually plan to (or want to) do this season.
It’s a great question. Last week’s post was pretty generic.
Today I’m sharing my a list of things I actually hope to do this season. I made one for summer–but didn’t think anyone would find it interesting. Guess I was wrong. So here goes. My Minot Fall Bucket List.
My Minot Fall Bucket List
Here is a quick printable. I’ll list them below with links too. Let’s have a great season. Please note, these are in no particular order.
Keep visiting the Zoo until it’s too cold to enjoy
Be Part of the Community
Join me on Instagram and Facebook where I can get to know you better. Seriously, I’m here to help. And there, you’ll be joined by a community of awesome people striving to live intentionally everyday and find joy in all circumstances. I post daily encouragement, a weekly event round up in Stories and a behind the scenes look at how I spend my days in Minot.
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