It’s been a while since I’ve given you an update on my back situation. {You can see the beginning of the ordeal here.} So I’ll be quick. I really don’t like to dwell, or complain, or belly ache about my circumstances. I hope you don’t see this post as any of that.
I have a pretty nasty herniated disc. To fix me, I’ll need a quick, minimally invasive surgery.
Now, the doors and windows thing.
The news that there was something seriously upset in my spine was pretty life altering. I thought that I’d be able to go back to, or keep teaching {at least the low impact} classes at the gym. The news of surgery and serious disc issues led to immediate orders that I stop teaching all classes…and the major blow that I will {most likely} never be able to go back to that line of work again.
With time, and rest, and following the doctors orders, in the future I will be able to return to exercising. Just not for a long time. And probably never like I had been.
But God is good all the time. Even in the crummiest, poopiest, poop pile. God is good.
Before the initial injury, I had been praying about what I should be doing. With my life, my time, my talents. See, God made a real grab-bag when He whipped me up. I have a million interests and a skill set that is as diverse as the big box of Crayolas. I was feeling like a change was coming. Like I needed to hone in on a few things. However, in order to do that, I would need to cut something out. So I prayed. I prayed about leaving the fitness game, because somewhere deep inside, I felt like I was using the job title “fitness instructor” as a mask. It was an easy thing to tell people when they asked what my job is, or “what I do…” Easier than telling them I’m a bit of a jack-of-all-trades who loved undertaking giant projects, I work really hard at lots of things but bring home less money than a teenager working the Taco Bell drive through, I kind of do photography, and design, and I write this blog…I volunteer, and really I just do the things that I see need to be done–if I can.
But that title is gone now. And I’m at peace about it. Folks keep asking me how I’m doing with the loss of my fitness career. And, honestly I’m fine. God shut that door. And that’s cool. I asked Him if I should close it and He went ahead and did it for me. But, He is always faithful…and with that direction gone, He was quick to give me other opportunities. Opportunities I didn’t seek out, or even knew existed.
After I got the news that the gym was out of the picture, I started getting calls. One invited me to be an artist as a summer concert series…I’ll be doing visual arts–not musical arts. Nobody panic. Another invited me to be a vendor at our local jazz festival…where I could sell pieces that I’ve made. Another call ended with a freelance writing gig {I love to write.} And another lined up an ongoing commercial multimedia project.
God is so good. And while one door has closed, like the Reverend Mother told Maria as she left the convent, “When the Lord closes a door, somewhere He opens a window.” I’m feeling very blessed…like I better be sure I’m always fully clothed…because God has surrounded me with lots of windows.
Have you had doors close lately? Have you found your windows, or are you still looking? I’d love to hear from you and know how I could pray for you.
xo
Amy
Pssst! The nifty art in this post is some stuff I’ve been working on since I’m not working out. After the initial sales, you’ll find those and items like it for sale right here at the website!
